Okay, let’s drop the bullshit, nothing will help you survive the apocalypse except this product. Everything else is garbage’s garbage. Seriously, don’t waste your time, just buy it now and thank me later – hurry up, it’ll be in high demand after my customer review:
If you’re still reading, I’ll assume you’ve already purchased this finely tuned machine. Before it arrives, be sure to get your Nerf™ Concealed Carry Certification and Permit so you can inconspicuously inconvenience the zombies. Pro tip: don’t gather the bullets once you’ve gotten the zombies to flee as it will act as a sort of moat to keep them away.
You may suggest that one should just dump massive amounts of bullets into the yard, as it will be much more time efficient than firing every round. Well to that, I say…
It’s™ Nerf™ or™ nothin’™.
I apologize sincerely if you read this, please don’t leave forever – I’ll understand if it’s for awhile though.